Krissy 80: geek meat! DoNotExist: Are you threatening me? Krissy 80: No, just pointing out the obvious... though, now that I think of it, I am a bit peckish.... DoNotExist: So, like, what do we do? Krissy 80: well, you *could* actually take a look inside.... Krissy 80: instead of taking my word for it.... DoNotExist: Last time I looked inside something I got trapped in an underground cow factory. I think I'll pass. Krissy 80: fine, I'll go look. Krissy 80: ::steps over a chewed up geek corpse and disappears inside:: Krissy 80: the horrrrrrror!!!! ::staggers:: DoNotExist: Meep? Krissy 80: dear god no.... Strawberry! Grape!!! Lime!!!! Tangerine!!!! and ::gasp:: ...Blueberry!!! DoNotExist: cheese? Krissy 80: ::comes out looking somewhat nauseated:: you really need to see all this... ::takes your hand and pulls you in:: DoNotExist: No! You're a stranger! Help, help, I'm being abducted! DoNotExist: Hey, what IS this place? DoNotExist: Oh my God. ::turns pale:: This is where Apple sacrifices geeks to power their unholy creations. Krissy 80: ::the room is truly horrifying. desks and terminals line the room. iMac terminals.:: Krissy 80: ::dead geeks lie prone at the desks, bloody and chewed:: DoNotExist: And Viacom is part of it! DoNotExist: Look, there, the altar! Krissy 80: ::one geek's hand still rests on a bloody, yet stylish blue mouse:: DoNotExist: Wish I had my camera with me, Krissy 80: ::steps forward:: I do! ::pulls out a Polaroid Pop- Shots disposable camera:: Smile! ::steps back, a slight squishing sound as her foot lands on a severed hand:: DoNotExist: Here, take one of me! ::posing with a particularly disfigured corpse:: Krissy 80: ::aims the camera and fires a picture off, the flash reflecting off blood-splattered screens:: I hope that doesn't ruin the photo. DoNotExist: Now we can get home. Pictures sold to tabloids=$$$ for return ticket. Krissy 80: Yeah, but first we have to get out of here first... is there a phone in here...what am I thinking? Geeks don't use phones! Can you get one of the computers working? DoNotExist: Ew, I'm not touching that gore-splattered thing. It has... translucent panels! Krissy 80: Fine. as usual, I'm the one who has to sully her beautiful, soft hands. hey, what's this? ::bends toward a screen:: DoNotExist: Heh heh. ::having taken the camera while Kris wasn't looking, takes pictures of her bending over:: Krissy 80: I think this might be a satellite station... hey, what's with the flash??? DoNotExist: ::hides camera behind back:: ::hums innocently:: Krissy 80: ::glares:: look at this! it's the HQ! ::points at a screen showing the JLS garage. Delle and David are working on something that vaguely resembles either a bicycle or a Thighmaster:: Krissy 80: I knew I should have locked the garage. Krissy 80: Ooh! I wonder what this does! ::Pushes a random button:: Krissy 80: ::siren begins to ring in the JLS control booth:: MacCaislin: whoa...that's not cool. MacCaislin: ::leans over to see what's the matter:: Krissy 80: ::voices comes over the speakers:: hello? anyone sober? MacCaislin: not me... MacCaislin: well, I'm sober, just not fully conscious Krissy 80: whoa, I hear you! wait.... is this Masochrist? MacCaislin: ::nods::then remembers that he's not speaking face-to-face:: yea, that's me. Krissy 80: ::a bit of static, and something that sounds like cursing, then a sigh:: oh, hello. um.. I think there's video... ::monitor comes on, Lampbane's face appears on a red-streaked screen:: MacCaislin: Lampy...where are you? Krissy 80: um... Australia. I have a nice tan now. MacCaislin: Australia? Wow, we've been worried, you know. Krissy 80: I think I've got us a direct video feed to JLS HQ. ::waves at the camera and grins psychotically:: DoNotExist: Ummm. Krissy 80: say hello to Rob. Krissy 80: I mean Masochrist. Krissy 80: bastard. DoNotExist: Yeah! How dare he wear my bras without permission! He'll stretch it! Krissy 80: ::talks to Renie off-camera for a bit, the word "bastard" is heard:: Why? I left a perfectly good facsimile of myself. MacCaislin: your connection is really poor...can you do anything about it? Krissy 80: ::plays with knobs:: is this better? MacCaislin: yes...a little bit MacCaislin: now, you were saying about this robot you left...it sorta came apart. Krissy 80: yeah, I heard. Good thing I filled out my warranty card... Krissy 80: oops, she wandered off again. MacCaislin: who wandered? Krissy 80: Renie. I gave her a camera. She's having fun photographing corpses. and my ass. MacCaislin: You found her? Krissy 80: ::yells behind her:: stop that!!! Krissy 80: ah, forget her. she can't wander very far... ::a thud comes from the background:: MacCaislin: Guess not. So the two of you are in Australia. Great. I assume you'll be coming back soon. Krissy 80: ::sticky sound:: Come back? Why on earth do I want to come back? Krissy 80: I've got sun and laughs and a donkey. MacCaislin: Well, for one thing, because you'll have a better chance dodging the Viacomese and their ritualistic murder. Krissy 80: oh. that would explain the corpses. Krissy 80: I thought it was the work of dingoes. MacCaislin: not likely, since they've been on your trail. Krissy 80: ::another thud is heard in the background:: trail? ::turns around and yells:: leave the geek meat alone! MacCaislin: ::takes human shape:: Whoops, forgot I was disembodied. Geek meat? Krissy 80: yeah, the usual.. hideously mutilated corpses, blood-streaked iMacs... ::shudder:: IMacs... MacCaislin: yuck...did there have to be IMacs? Krissy 80: don't remind me! I'm touching one! I'll have to shower for weeks to get the stigma off! Krissy 80: ::rubs hands on face, leaving a bloody streak:: MacCaislin: Hm. You should probably stop that. ::shakes head:: We're getting off-topic. The Viacomese? MacCaislin: have you seen them? Krissy 80: we're sitting in a giant iMac filled with geek corpses in the middle of the desert. Krissy 80: what do you think? MacCaislin: but you don't know where they ARE. That stuff only tells you that they've BEEN. MacCaislin: This is something the whole League needs to tackle. Krissy 80: the whole league? you mean like you and me and Renie and Delle and David and his.... ego? Krissy 80: ::jaw drops wide open as she turns away from the camera to look at something else:: MacCaislin: Yes. All of us. We stand a better chance t... Lampbane? Krissy 80: turn on CNN. MacCaislin: ::flicks on the TV:: Krissy 80: ::Midtown Manhattan is a wreck... flames, destroyed buildings:: MacCaislin: What the HELL is going on? Krissy 80: ::a middle-aged, haggard looking woman appears on the screen with a mic in one hand and whisky in the other:: MacCaislin: ::leans in toward TV:: Krissy 80: "....the destruction left in it's wake. we can only hope that somehow it can be placated." Krissy 80: "again, for those just tuning in, Manhattan is under siege." MacCaislin: that WHAT can be placated? Shit, I KNEW we should have invested in a TiVo ! Krissy 80: "What appears to be a giant ego is rampaging along Broadway, crushing cars and demanding to see what can only be translated as "Hot Lesbo Action." MacCaislin: ::groaning:: Droolwood! Krissy 80: "yes, that has been confirmed. again, I warn all those watching: this ego is extremely obnoxious and horny." MacCaislin: without a corporeal body, I can't even try to control him! Krissy 80: "it appears to be headed toward Greenwich Village." MacCaislin: Someone has to find out what happened to his staff. Krissy 80: um.... Krissy 80: um... MacCaislin: His staff? That useless thing he calls a "weapon" ? Krissy 80: long story. MacCaislin: Well, looks like you know more than me anyway. Drag Spoink in by the hair if you have to. Krissy 80: actually, TBD knows about as much as I do. and me and Reen have a little business of our own anyway. MacCaislin: This demands rather immediate action. I'll round up the others. Masochrist out. Krissy 80: okay. later. Krissy 80: bastard.